“Hey honey, where are my socks, AHHHHH… SO MUCH OF ANGER AND FRUSTRATION??Cm’on don’t be so dumb, don’t tell me you don’t remember.” or “Mom, where is my breakfast?? I’m getting late to college.” Or, .. ” Are you mad?? Why didn’t you gave me the right signal…???? Now pay the damage….
“ughhhhhhhh.. Why only me?????”
Hey, beautiful and amazingly awesome readers out there.You might have gone through one or more of these situations in your daily life. We all get angry at various aspects of our lives. And find it difficult to deal with problems at that situation.
We often find it so hard to deal with situations, that instead of improving them, we just mess it up.It is so important skill to develop, to control our anger and frustration that it can take lives if gets out of control. A very fatal and harmful feature in humans that is ANGER.
ABOUT ANGER AND FRUSTRATION:
The one who is able to control it, will be able to see the world in different perspective and can take much better decisions than others.
So, to teach you this crucial factor, and help you master your emotions and have total control on it, I’m here and I’m going to tell you about 5 practical and efficient tips to control anger and frustration from today. These tips will not only make you understand the logic behind your anger, but also a way out to control it in best possible way. And improve your communication with people.
1.STUDY AND CONTROL ANGER AND FRUSTRATION:
Very well said, “THE BEST THING YOU CAN LEARN FROM LIFE IS TO MASTER HOW TO REMAIN CALM”. But in today’s world people USUALLY get very shot tempered due to their lifestyle and regular diet.
Why to study cause of anger?:
If we deeply want to solve our anger problem, we need to find the roots of the anger in our brain and hit on the right place to control it. And most importantly, before we move on to the various tips to control anger and frustration, we should first go for the study of cause of anger.
WHAT IS THE CAUSE OF ANGER AND FRUSTRATION ?:
If you have ever noticed yourself at the time you get angry, you may have found that it just comes in a second. But you’ve never noticed the cause behind it. Let me tell you, Every anger has the same reason.
Now you might be wondering.. How can be there a same reason behind everyone’s anger? But it is true, the biggest cause of anger is when you are scared of something or worried about something.
OK… let me explain with an example. One day I was asking my mom ,” Mom, why dad gets angry on me all the time?? don’t he care about me ? Or do he really love me?” then my mother said ” Son, he cares for you that’s why he gets angry on you.” At that very moment, I was not getting what she was trying to explain me. In fact, you also might have been through the same situation.
But after experiencing life a bit, I got to know what she meant.
Just imagine your car has been banged with some other person’s vehicle. So you may get angry on him or he’ll be angry on you. You both will be fighting like the very next moment you’ll kill each other.
Now here if you notice carefully, you might be afraid of reaching late at some destination. Or he might not be having money to repair his vehicle and now he is frustrated and hence angry.
If we take another example here, if you are late for some important meeting and stuck in traffic, you might be getting more angry as compared to when you are on time. Because when you are late, you are actually getting scared of being late and thus getting more and more frustrated while you stuck in the same traffic problem regularly.
So I hope you are clear with the reason behind your anger.
How to address your fear behind your ANGER AND FRUSTRATION ?:
Now some of you may also find it difficult to figure out the actual fear hiding behind your anger. So here is the best way to do that too. Some times a situation comes in our lives that we get angry without any cause.
Here, we should feel excited too because our brain is really hiding something from us. So we need to find that hidden enemy and Kill him with our AWM by a head shot like we do it in PUBG.
The moment you feel frustrated with no reason, take a pen (AWM) and piece of paper and try to list things which went wrong through out day and will effect in future. Go through that list and analyze how problems can be cured. And it will be noticed that anger will be gone as soon as you solve those issues.
IS ANGER “BAD”?:
You might have heard your parents saying “Anger is a bad”. Or anger can harm you. And if you get angry, you are a bad person.
My honest opinion about this:
Honestly, Anger is neither good or bad, but the way you react after getting angry defines how good and bad you are. So you need to keep a thing in mind that being angry is not a bad thing. Its a human nature. Even animals get angry at some moments . They too have feelings and have thoughts.
So don’t feel insecure and bad about yourself that you get angry in some situations. But try to find out ways so that you will be able to take good decisions at the time you feel frustrated.
TIPS TO CONTROL ANGER AND FRUSTRATION:
As now we have enough knowledge about our anger and some basic reasons why Anger is a part of our emotions.
So, now we are capable to understand the tips and logics behind controlling our anger. So here are the tips for which you are eager to know.
1.Take long deep breaths:
Now this is a thing which will not be able to adapt by you in one go. You might find it funny that at the time we go angry, we have no control on our body and how can we take deep breaths?
It will come with practice but believe me once you are able to control your actions you’ll be able to achieve anything in your life. So try to take deep breaths and hold it for a while and take at least 6-7 seconds to exhale.
Repeat this activity 8-10 times and it will be better than breaking someone’s jaw.
2. Find a source to release your ANGER AND FRUSTRATION :
Now this doesn’t mean that you harm someone or break something useful. Try to hit pillow or a thing which will tolerate some force and will also not affect you in return.
this will make you feel much better and feel somewhat relaxed. Now you’ll be feeling like some heavy load has been thrown away from your back.
This will also give you strength and a confidence that you are able to control yourself.
3.Don’t tell yourself you can’t control your anger:
This is also a very big problem that I generally see among that is they usually say that we cannot control our anger. This firm believe makes them get in more trouble while in anger.
And in this belief they not even try to make a solution of their anger hence ruin things for future. And then for whole life regret for what they did.
See how dangerous it is to give control to your anger. So always say to yourself that Anger is in me , I’am not in anger. We can very well control our feelings if we believe to do so.
4. Try to find a solution of the problem:
You might have heard that Successful people are always a SOLUTION OF A PROBLEM where as unsuccessful people are always PROBLEM OF A SOLUTION. This is actually very good quote and applies to our daily life very well.
So, finding solution of a problem in anger will not only make you control your situations well, but also make you think optimistically. So till now you were like” Why this happened to me??” …“Why he didn’t pick up the call??” … be an optimistic like “Ok, now what can be done to improve the situation??” or , “Let’s try to find out the solution dude .. things can be cured .. at this moment too..”
5. Work on the reasons which made you angry:
Now here, you should have some patience and just try to analyze the things which made you angry. So that in future you’ll be prepared and such reasons will not be able to make you angry anymore.
Now, if we notice here, you might be asking what about the reasons on which we have no control ??
And here we categorize the things into two :
- Reasons on which we have control:
- Reasons on which we have no control:
so now let us discuss about the problems or reasons which made us angry and we have so control. because these are some mistakes which can be cured and make us angry in 90% of the cases.
1.Reasons on which we have control:
Now let us take an example here to which we can relate well. Suppose you find some symptoms that your wife or girlfriend is cheating with you and you get very angry at that moment. A normal guy will go and just expel all the anger on her.
But the one who has read my article, (actually I’m giving myself a credit .. never mind ) will not just go and mess things up but try to analyze the problem and try to get a solution of the problem. For example in this case you will try to sit and talk to your partner to make things clear.
And in most of the cases you will find there was nothing wrong just a misunderstanding. And you yourself will feel very proud that you took the things very calmly and didn’t ruin things. This will not only make you feel good about yourself but also your partner feel good towards you.
2. Reasons on which we have no control:
Reasons on which we have no control the usually the things which bother us the most. so if we talk about what are the things on which we don’t have a control can be something to which we should not worry more.
Because what had to happen has already taken place, now the best thing here we can do here in this situation is to try to learn the lesson in that and move ahead.
Like in this case which we took above , let us consider that your partner is actually cheating with you. And want to spend rest of the life with someone else. So here, instead of getting angry, you should accept the situation. And make yourself find the optimism.
Now, I hope from now you will think at least before getting angry in your life and think before everything you do in frustration and anger.
Remember the words which are out of your mouth once are actually out now you cannot put them back. The very little movement of your tongue, you can make lives and relationships and destroy too.
So don’t be a fool and get yourself prepared for each and everything in future. Anger should not affect you a bit. Don’t just think of reacting in a situation.
And situations are part of life they are not meant to take place of life.